Ziva's Sex Toys
by StarkContrastStartles
Summary: Tony finds something that horrifies him in Ziva's bathroom. Sex Toys, Awkward Discussions, Tiva, UST, Sex, Kinky acts, Dates in Romantic Restaurants, Fast Driving, Passionate kisses in restaurant bathrooms...
1. The Discovery

His finger trailed along the side of the table as he slowly paced around the room. He had seen Ziva's old apartment many times but she had never invited him to her newest place of residence. Technically, she still hadn't, but he chose to overlook this fact. If he believed that he had a legitimate reason for being there, then he stood a greater chance of her accepting it too.

His eyes roamed greedily around the room. So far, he had contained his curiosity to the living room but his eyes kept being drawn towards the bedroom. The kitchen was messy, the counters hidden under groceries and the cupboard doors held ajar by the bulging contents. The living room was sparser, and almost seemed unlived in.

The kitchen was almost barren; the counters plainly visible and the cupboard doors open, revealing empty caverns behind. The living room was no cosier with plump seats, not squished by a lazy body, and the TV remote where it should be, on top of the TV. The scene was a stark contrast with Tony's own home, where the seats where permanently indented and the remotes lost beneath the stacks of magazines.

Finally, he glanced through the window to check that Ziva was not approaching and allowed himself to go into the bedroom. He heaved a sigh of relief once he saw the messy space; all worries of a Ziva who spent no time at home because she slept in other people's beds had vanished. Judging by the differences in mess, Ziva lived mostly in her bedroom. Clothes were strewn across the floor and the sheets were tangled at the foot of the unmade bed.

Stepping carefully through the mounds of fabric, Tony reached the bathroom. He delved straight into the cabinet under the sink and was instantly gratified. His hand emerged and he held up a vibrator. He raised it up with his index and thumb, gingerly examining it for regular or recent use. He grinned to himself and shook his head at his partner's secret dirty habits. He laid the vibrator on the toilet lid and reached into the cabinet again. His eager fingers curled around something cylindrical, presumably a sex toy, but one he was not familiar with. He extracted it from the toothbrushes and toilet rolls and pulled it out into the open air. This time, when he realised what it was, no smile appeared but a look of pure horror.

He dropped the offending article onto the bath mat and stared at it in dumb disbelief. His eyes narrowed and his brows knitted as he surveyed it. It took the click of the lock and female footsteps to jerk him back into reality and his numb hands tried to hide all evidence of his snooping. Ziva seemed to sense an unwelcome presence because she called out and walked straight into the bedroom. Tony straightened up and flushed the toilet, kicking the cabinet door shut. Ziva barged into the bathroom, not giving Tony time to zip up his fly, had it been undone, and began to shout at him.

Tony waited for the tirade to end before attempting to protest his innocence.

'I was waiting but you were taking ages and I had to pee,' he explained.

'Tony, that is breaking and entering,' she argued. 'You can't break into my house.'

'I really had to pee,' he repeated insistently.

She opened her mouth to continue but paused as she noticed the rumpled bath mat. 'What have you been doing in here?' Her eyes swivelled to the cabinet, seemingly untouched. 'Where did you look?' she accused.

'Nowhere,' Tony tried to look innocent. 'Why?'

'Tony, this is you we are talking about. You did not come in here and not look around.' Her voice was sharp and tense and Tony almost felt bad for invading her personal space. Almost.

'I had to pee and then you came back. I had no time to look anywhere,' he protested.

She eyed him suspiciously for a second before pushing him out of her bathroom. 'Wait outside,' she commanded.

Tony sat down in the unused armchair and shuddered as he remembered what he had found the second time he delved into the cabinet. Why did Ziva have that? What was she not telling him?


	2. The Aftershock

_**This chapter has been changed – someone suggested that my original idea needed some work and I decided that I agreed. I couldn't think of anywhere to take it so I changed it. (Ziva initially had a strap on penis as the second item)**_

Ziva emerged from her bedroom looking slightly flustered but ravishing in her tight, black jeans and simple dark t-shirt. Tony stood up and, avoiding her eyes, followed her down to the car.

'Gibbs won't be happy we've taken so long,' Tony remarked coolly, trying to break the stifling silence that had grown between them on the slow moving car journey.

'We would be there already if you had just let me drive,' Ziva grumbled.

'We'd be in the hospital along with lots of other innocent people if you were driving through this,' he returned, gesturing at the traffic. His voice was annoyed but he was glad that the tension had gone.

'I have never ended up in hospital yet,' Ziva argued truthfully.

Tony shook his head disbelievingly and turned his attention back to the road. The car inched forward before juddering to a halt once more. Although he was desperate to get out of the congestion, he was dreading arriving at work because Gibbs had instructed him to get there immediately over an hour before. He fervently wished he had not volunteered to pick up Ziva because now not only had he discovered something unsettling about her, he was also going to have to face his angry boss.

His eyes slid over to Ziva's motionless form. She was staring straight ahead, her eyes lazily flicking over each car, scrutinising each driver and examining each pedestrian. He kept his eyes firmly fixed on her head, not allowing himself to imagine Ziva making use of the disturbing artefacts he had found in her bathroom.

They arrived finally and ran into the building. Ziva jabbed aggressively at the elevator button until Tony laid a soothing hand on hers to stop her breaking the lift. The ascension to the top floor seemed to take an age and the tardy partners hopped about impatiently. As soon as the doors opened, they were through them and rushing towards their desks. They flung down their bags and flopped onto their seats. No sooner had they turned their computers on to look as if they had been working diligently, Gibbs rounded the corner.

'You're late,' he barked.

Ziva and Tony both began offering incoherent explanations but Gibbs cut them off abruptly.

'Come on,' he ordered and disappeared behind his desk. Ziva and Tony mimicked his actions and followed him back into the elevator, fully ready to begin their day.

The crime scene was typical; murdered marine, the hysterical woman who found the mutilated body; everything you would expect from a death and nothing demanding to take Tony's mind off his recent discovery.

His mind seemed to revert back to their old pornographic ways and he found that expelling the explicit images was more difficult than he had imagined. His trousers were getting increasingly tight and his cheeks were becoming more flushed by the fantasy. Masturbating Ziva's danced in front of his eyes and he felt quite faint when the real, fully clothed version spoke to him about blood and weapons.

He kept wiping his hands on his trousers in a childish attempt to rid himself of the dirty feeling they had after holding the sex toys from Ziva's bathroom cabinet.

The vibrator was kinky but it was the second object that stuck fast in his mind. The Ben Wa Balls. The sex toy which you left in for longer periods of time which had produced the question plaguing him since he had discovered them. Had she ever had them in at work?

_**.net/how_to_use_ben_wa_ for information on Ben Wa Balls (I had no idea what they were) or search it on Wikipedia – very enlightening**_


	3. The Questions

**If you read the first two chapters before I posted this one up, you should go back and read the last couple of lines of Chapter 2 because it has changed slightly. If you have read it all at once, ignore this and continue. Also, sorry for taking so long to update this story again but I forgot about it until I noticed the number of hits.**

The words on the screen blurred and became a fuzzy mix of black and white. Ziva blinked to right her vision but her eyes kept clouding over. She was trying desperately to focus her mind on the task but the horror of Tony in her bathroom refused to leave her.

She knew that it was ridiculous; he would not know how unnerving it was to see him in there because he did not know what she did there. He had not been snooping in her cabinet, she kept repeating to herself like a mantra. Tony had some, admittedly limited, scruples at least and he would not invade her privacy in such a blatant way. Nonetheless, the image of Tony standing awkwardly by her toilet, inexplicably flustered, with the shadow of herself in the bath clutching a vibrator and moaning throatily, was haunting her relentlessly.

Technically, the bath should be a place of cleanliness and purity, but to Ziva it represented filthy activities. From her favourite position with her feet resting on the tap head, her arm reached perfectly into the cabinet, where she stored her most prized possessions. She would pick a toy to play with that night and then the fun would begin in earnest. Slip the vibrator in and move it in and out, easing all the tensions built up by her overflowing desires. The ecstasy would rise until it boiled over and escaped her lips in a heartrending scream. The pulsing music would mostly cover up the shrieks of fiery release but every so often her exuberance would overpower the innocent sound and call a neighbour round to blush and stammer their pleas for quiet. A rasping, shaky breath would round off her endeavour and she would drop the toy onto the floor, out of her weary, exhausted hand. Occasionally, Tony's face would appear while she was recovering, panting and fantasising. She only ever let it linger in front of her glassy eyes before gritting her teeth and expelling any illusions about their purely platonic relationship.

He was staring at her now; his eyes wide and interested, his mouth hanging agape. She raised her eyebrows quizzically and his gaze shot down to the crumpled sheet of paper he had been unwittingly twisting in his hands.

'Yes?' she asked loudly, annoyed with all the careful avoidances.

'Huh?' he stammered. 'What?'

'You want to say something,' she stated firmly.

He shook his head hurriedly. 'No, I don't,' he protested.

'Tony, you have been staring at me all day,' she reminded him. 'You have something to say, say it.'

He studied her, collecting his thoughts and rationalising his next action. His expression was still doubtful but, regardless of his inhibitions, he stood up and crossed the room to sit on her desk, facing away from her. 'You are a very interesting woman, Miss David,' he began conversationally. She sighed and folded her arms, leaning back in her chair and staring up at the tight, grey suit jacket he was displaying. 'And,' he continued. 'You are very good at keeping secrets.' She nodded behind his back. 'Today, in your bathroom...' His speech tailed off momentarily as he lost himself in his swirling thoughts. She sat up straight and leant to one side to get a better view of his face. His usually transparent expression was unreadable.

'Yes?' she prompted.

'You were acting strangely,' he concluded. He twisted round to face her. 'Why?'

She frowned. She had been sure that he was going to confess to looking through her things but all he had done was put her on the spot. She had been preparing to attack him not have to defend herself so her mouth remained firmly clamped shut for a minute while she constructed her reply.

'You had broken into my house,' she explained calmly. 'I was not expecting anyone to be there. You could have been anyone.'

He chuckled. 'You were going to shoot me?' he asked.

'You were lucky I didn't,' she answered. 'You should not break into other people's houses. Especially not mine,' she warned, her tone menacing.

Tony nodded vaguely, his mind preoccupied with the new question this argument had posed. Why had she not had her gun out? She had been intensely trained and she always seemed to know when there was an intruder. She must have known someone was there; indeed she had called out and headed straight for his location, so she should have been ready to shoot them. He could have been anybody. 'Why didn't you?' he inquired curiously.

She eyed him, surprised by the question. 'I could smell you. You have a distinctive smell.' As way of proof, she sniffed him and nodded, her eyes shining with triumph. He could almost hear the 'Ha! Once again I beat you!' He pouted sulkily and hopped off her desk. He made to return to his own desk but her next words stopped him short. 'It's a very nice smell,' she remarked kindly.

'Really? What do I smell of?' His reply was self-satisfied and arrogant on the surface but Ziva detected the genuine interest and surprise at her admittance.

She snorted and sniffed again, pretending to consider her answer thoughtfully in spite of the fact that she had memorised his scent and could describe it easily. 'Like Tony,' she answered after much deliberation. This response pleased Tony and a smile plastered itself goofily on his face. He leant over and sniffed her.

'And you, Ziva, smell like Ziva. Surprising really, isn't it?' he said, attempting to cover up his pleasure.

She pulled a face at him and turned her attention back to the computer screen, although it made just as little sense to her now as it did before the conversation. She had managed to divert his attention from the initial topic of why she had acted so strangely at finding him in the most sensitive place in her apartment but she still did not know whether he had found her secret stash of toys. Her brain was aching with the need to know what he had discovered. She would have to find some way of tricking him into telling her if he had seen too much.


	4. The Discussion

Ziva spent the rest of the day pushing up against Tony and subtly grinding her hips against him. A smirk appeared on her face every time she felt him tense and saw his cheeks flush. After a while, he stayed stubbornly hidden behind his desk.

Tony glared at her innocent face with a mixture of lust and annoyance. She had been taunting him all day and his work had suffered noticeably. His head still stung from the slap and his ears burned from the reprimanding dished out by his esteemed boss. His fingers were twitching, torn between a desire to throttle her and a nagging obsession with her hands. His eyes grew wide when he looked at them; fascinated with the possibilities they represented to him. He gulped and tried to expel the recurring image of Ziva moaning and wailing, wet on her bathroom floor. The paper blurred in front of his eyes and he left it clouded for a moment while he concentrated on the masturbating Ziva, writhing before him.

A leering smile pulled the edges of his mouth up and he opened his eyes lazily, satisfied with the vivid picture. He jumped out of his seat and landed on the floor, his chiar crashing against the back of his cubicle, when his eyes opened fully and he was confronted with Ziva's face looming over his desk. She was leaning on his papers and staring down at him, her shirt gaping open and awarding him a rare view down to her bra.

'Tony,' she snapped, trying to get his attention.

'Yes, Ziva?' he choked.

'You have gone off into a world,' she said thoughtfully.

He frowned before correcting her. 'My own little world.'

'What?' Ziva raised her eyebrows in question.

'I had gone off into my own little world,' he repeated.

Ziva clicked her tongue. 'Yes, Tony. That is what I said,' she told him exasperated by his lack of focus. Tony sighed and waited for her to move her hands, having forgotten about her initial statement. 'Well?' she prodded.

'What?' he hissed.

'Why have gone off?' she asked impatiently.

He stared at her for a minute, not comprehending her meaning before nodding as it dawned on him. 'I was just daydreaming,' he explained.

'Yes, but why?' She rolled her eyes at Tony's slow mind.

He shrugged. 'I don't know.'

'What were you dreaming about?' she inquired, her tone implying that he had better cooperate or she will force his hand. He gulped at the threatening voice but kept his mouth shut. 'McGee?' she asked. 'You were imagining him naked?' Tony started, uncertain where this unprecedented thought had come from. 'Gibbs?' she continued. 'Abby?' Tony's lips twitched slightly, preferring this suggestion to her other two. 'Me?' The final question rolled off her tongue lightly but his reaction was being studied carefully. He spluttered and shook his head vehemently. 'Me,' she stated.

'No,' he protested limply. 'I was just daydreaming. I can't remember what it was about.'

'Then you don't know if it was about me,' she rationalised. Tony blinked.

'Uh...' he stuttered. She smirked and cocked her head to one side.

'So, what was your dream about, Tony?' She elongated his name until it became a dirty sounding word, like the kind he was used to hearing moaned in his ear during sex.

He shifted uncomfortably in his seat before meeting her eyes squarely on. 'You were dancing,' he told her, keeping a straight face. 'You were dancing with a gorilla on your desk.' His voice sped up as he got excited. 'Pole dancing, stripping. You were kissing the gorilla.' He stopped as Ziva placed a finger on his lips.

'Tony,' she warned.

'You really want to know?' he asked. She nodded. 'I will tell you, if you tell me something,' he bargained.

'What do you want to know?' She was instantly suspicious and reluctant.

'Why are you acting so strangely?' Her face remained impassive and his spirits brightened, perhaps she would take the deal.

'Fine,' she accepted. 'But, you go first.'

He nodded. 'You were in the bath.' She felt the heat in her cheeks rising but she pushed it back down and kept her complexion normal. 'You were naked.' She pressed down harder on the table, fighting to stop herself from blushing. 'You were splashing about.' This derivation from the reality of her bath life released her bubbling discomfort and she relaxed. 'Your turn,' he instructed.

'You broke into my house. I think I am entitled to a little fun. It is only fair,' she explained flatly before turning away and strutting back to her own desk. Tony got up and followed her, feeling short changed.

'That isn't an answer,' he complained. 'Why have you been rubbing up against me?'

She laughed and leaned over her desk to whisper to him, her nose inches from his ear. 'I am just very, very attracted to you, Tony,' she murmured seductively. He licked his lips and forced a smirk.

'Isn't everyone?' he retorted. 'I am incredibly handsome and irresistible.'

'Not to everyone, DiNozzo,' Gibbs called as he hurried past. 'What have you got?' Tony jumped up and spun around, flustered by the interruption.

'Uh...' he flailed, his work being almost nonexistent. Ziva grinned at him and took over, her hard work earning her a curt nod from Gibbs. Gibbs glanced up to the balcony and, spotting the Director looking pointedly in his direction, swept away up to meet him.

Tony watched him go, resent plain on his face. 'Do you have to be so smug?' he whined. Ziva gave him a simpering smirk and flung herself back onto her chair. 'It was all your fault I had nothing,' Tony continued. 'You were distracting me.'

'You are too easily distracted,' she explained. 'And, it wasn't my fault you were daydreaming about me.' As soon as she said this, her cheeks flushed and she bowed her head, resuming her work.

Tony watched her typing, his curiosity about her illicit artefacts consuming him. He was so caught up in his own thoughts that when Gibbs returned, half an hour later, he had nothing to show him.

'Get your head out of the bedroom,' Gibbs warned. 'And, do some damn work.' He slammed his fist down on the table to reiterate his point and stomped off to Abby's lab.

Tony bit his lip, embarrassed and angry, his mind seething with annoyance at the conceited look of satisfaction on Ziva's face. It was common enough, indeed it took pride of place on his own face regularly, but it was different when his mind was preoccupied with her. He made up his mind and returned to his earlier position on Ziva's desk, facing away from her.

'In your bathroom,' he began. Ziva shot out of her chair at these words and moved so she was facing him on the other side of her desk. 'I saw some things...'

Ziva interrupted him sharply. 'You were snooping, Tony. I cannot believe you. Do you have no concept of privacy? That was my house and my bathroom and you had no right...'

Tony stopped her flow of anger by holding up a soothing hand. 'I was not snooping,' he protested. 'I was looking for something.'

'Oh, sorry,' she apologised, her voice dripping with sarcasm. 'What were you looking for exactly, Tony? My toothbrush?'

Tony sighed resignedly. 'Ziva...' he pacified.

'What did you find?' Ziva asked wearily, giving up on attacking Tony, figuring he was ashamed enough.

Now it was Tony's turn to blush and he did it gracelessly and profusely. 'Uh...' Ziva's face hardened at his clear mortification. She closed her eyes and prepared for the confession. 'I found some...' Tony faltered.

He was released from his torment by the appearance of a jovial McGee, beaming and bearing coffee. 'Where's Gibbs?' he asked brightly, carefully placing a paper cup on Gibbs's desk. Tony and Ziva shrugged; pleased at being freed from the obligation to have an awkward conversation but also infuriated that they would now be dreading the talk until they got it over with.


	5. The Confession

They went home still unsure what the other knew. Tony was torturing himself with images of gyrating Ziva's screaming his name as she rubbed herself in the NCIS bathroom. How he wished he had made it a regular occurrence to burst in on her in the bathroom. Ziva was furious with both herself and Tony. He had invaded her privacy shamelessly and she had let him do it. She was almost completely sure that he had seen her secret collection of toys but she preferred to be positive before she launched into any attack. IT wouldn't do to injure an innocent Tony, however guilty he had seemed. Both parties tossed and turned all night, the discovery weighed heavily on their minds.

Ziva's morning run was shorter and sweatier than usual; her mind was occupied elsewhere. Tony got up an hour later than usual but he didn't rush his routine, if anything, he slowed it down.

'Where have you been DiNozzo?' Gibbs shouted at him the second he sat down.

'Sorry, Boss,' Tony apologised weakly. 'I didn't notice the time.'

Gibbs growled at his lame excuse and stormed down to talk to Ducky about the body in autopsy.

'Wake up late, Tony?' Ziva sang across the bullpen.

'Yes,' Tony snapped. 'Is that a problem?'

'No, Tony. Just wondering why,' she chorused.

'What put you in such a good mood today?' he asked grumpily.

She shrugged. 'I did not wake up late. I had a very productive morning. I took a long bath,' she told him suggestively.

Tony inhaled deeply and his eyes widened at the implication. 'A long bath?' he queried. 'How long, exactly?'

'Long enough,' she replied softly. 'Just long enough.'

He gulped. 'Was it a good bath?'

She smiled. 'Very good,' she growled, wrinkling her nose at the memory.

'What did you do?' he asked, mesmerised by the scene playing in his head.

'What I usually do in the bath, Tony,' she answered cryptically.

'And what is that, Ziva?' he asked, stepping towards her.

She stood up to meet his advance. 'I play.' She paused and licked her lips before continuing. 'With Toys.'

He shut his eyes, hardly daring to hope for the confession which seemed imminent. 'What toys?' he choked through dry lips.

Her eyes hardened. 'You were in my bathroom,' she told him softly. 'What toys did you see there?'

He opened his mouth but no sound came out so he left it hanging open gormlessly.

'Tony?' she prompted.

He chewed on his lip, considering his options. 'I found some toys,' he acknowledged. 'But I was not quite sure what they were.'

She leaned towards him so that he could feel her warm breath on his chin. 'You're a big boy, Tony. I'm sure you could hazard a guess.'

He twisted his fingers together. 'I couldn't quite believe my guess though, Ziva,' he explained. 'It didn't seem possible. Not for you.' She blushed profusely and seemed almost to regret having started this discussion but she allowed him to continue. 'But it was very intriguing, I must admit.' He stopped and looked her directly in the eyes. 'Do you take baths often, Ziva?' he asked, unabashed with the forward question.

'I should hope so,' Gibbs interrupted. 'Don't want to scare away witnesses with bad smelling agents.'

Tony groaned inwardly. 'Just when we were making headway,' he muttered under his breath.

'Very often, Gibbs,' Ziva reassured him, watching Tony intently as she confessed. A smile broke out on his face and he returned to his desk looking radiant.

'Good mood today, Tony,' McGee noted, coming in and sitting down at his desk.

'Thank you, Tim, I am,' Tony remarked cheerfully. McGee frowned, unused to hearing Tony use his forename. 'I got given some very good news today.'

'You got a date?' McGee suggested.

'Perhaps,' Tony replied, looking at Ziva and raising his eyebrows questioningly.

'I have a date tonight, McGee,' Ziva called across, her eyes never leaving Tony's.

'With whom?' McGee prodded.

'A friend,' Ziva informed him. 'Nobody special.'

Tony spent the rest of the day walking round with a perpetual grin on his face. He was finally going to talk to Ziva about his discovery and it had been called a date! He knew that there was a good possibility that she had not meant it romantically but still, he reassured himself. She had still called it a date.

Ziva was considering what the right amount to tell Tony would be. If she revealed too much, there friendship could be ruined but, now that she had decided to include him in her clandestine activities, she couldn't back out. They had a date later that night.


	6. The Date

Gibbs noticed the uncharacteristically quiet bullpen as he charged in so he paused behind his desk, watching them curiously. 'Go home,' he barked eventually and waited for them to pack up their things. McGee was usually the quickest to log off due to his fast typing and did not bother to wait for his colleagues to escort him out. Today, however, he lingered at his computer, glancing surreptitiously over the top of his monitor at Ziva and Tony who were moving as slowly as was possible.

At last, they had nothing left to dither over and, eying each other's progress warily, they reluctantly moved into the middle of the bullpen. McGee hurried with his packing up and trotted after them, his eyes bright with anticipation. Gibbs frowned, puzzling over this peculiar display of behaviour, and chased after them, slipping into the elevator just as the doors were about to close.

The ride down to the car park was tense and silent. Tony and Ziva kept glancing at each other, shifting their gaze when they met the other's eyes. McGee was hot with excitement and his body was twitching uncontrollably. The discomfort was mostly felt by Gibbs, however, the only occupant of the elevator with no idea what was going on to cause this friction. Gibbs was not used to being the only clueless one in a group and he resolved to grill Abby about this the next day.

Satisfied with his decision, he sprinted out of the elevator and, without a backwards glance, sped off in his car. McGee trailed behind Tony and Ziva like a lost puppy. There was an awkward distance between the other two agents and they avoided bumping shoulders as they strode towards their cars. They paused as they reached Ziva's car. McGee hesitated but finally nodded and excused himself, hurrying off to his car, throwing nosy glances over his shoulder, having promised to Abby that he would find out all he could and report back to her.

Tony shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot. 'What do we do now?' he muttered.

'What?' Ziva asked loudly.

Tony scowled. 'I said, Ziva, what do we do now?' he repeated irritably.

She shrugged. 'I guess we decide where we are going to go.' She paused before adding hopefully, 'unless you don't want to do this anymore.'

Tony looked up sharply from his feet. 'You promised,' he replied accusingly.

'I know,' she answered softly. 'Where do you want to go?' she asked, ashamed that she had hurt his feelings.

'Our usual place?' he suggested. Her shoulders slumped and her face fell. He spotted this instantly and corrected his mistake. 'Or we could go somewhere else, of course.' His stomach rumbled. 'Are you hungry?' he inquired, rubbing his complaining torso. She giggled.

'Italian,' she offered. He nodded, smiling gratefully for the decisive option. 'I'll follow you.' She stuck her keys into the lock and slipped into the dark seat of her garishly painted Mini Cooper.

'Wait,' he called after her. 'Which Italian restaurant?'

'Your favourite,' she responded firmly. 'I'll follow.'

He smiled and nodded, turning and hurrying off to his own car. He drove slowly past her, inching towards the gates to allow her to catch up only to find her honking impatiently within seconds of pulling out of her space. Eyes widened, he sped up and his foot was pressed down on the accelerator much further down than he would normally. Still, though, she continued to beep and her bumper was very close to the fender on the back of his saloon.

He ended up skipping three red lights and exceeding the speed limit by ten miles an hour, narrowly missing an old lady and a lamppost, pressured by the peer pressure in the form of a dangerous Israeli woman leaning on her horn and threatening to bash the back of his prized car in. He skidded to a halt in a narrow parking space and hopped out, slamming his door angrily.

'What the hell was that, Ziva?' he yelled as she skipped towards him.

'You drive like a headless chicken, Tony,' she shouted back.

'Old lady, I drive like an old lady,' he corrected.

'Thank you for admitting it,' Ziva mocked, slipping her arm through his and directing him towards the entrance.

'Ziva,' he pulled away. 'I almost killed an old lady.'

'You should practice your driving skills,' she advised. 'Your swerving was a bit slow.'

He stopped and pulled her back roughly. 'This isn't a joke,' he bellowed. 'Someone could have been hurt.'

She looked him straight in the eye, her pride wounded by his accusation. 'I'm sorry,' she whispered finally. He nodded and slipped his arm into hers. She pressed herself apologetically against him, seeking his forgiveness. He returned the embrace and she smiled, not liking the tone he had taken earlier.

Their brief moment of affection was broken a few seconds later, however, as they squeezed into the packed restaurant. They were directed to a small table in the centre of the room, surrounded by nuzzling couples. Ziva wrinkled her nose as the occupants of the table next to theirs kissed, leaning over their tasty food.

'Very secluded,' she remarked drily. 'You sure know how to pick them.' She eyed him suspiciously. 'How many of your dates have you brought here and done that to?' she asked, gesturing to a couple heading for the toilets together, their intention obvious. She shuddered. 'I will not be going to the bathroom here,' she noted, thanking the waitress for the water she had just brought.

He laughed. 'I have never had sex in here,' he replied. 'I prefer the more conventional bed.' He leaned over the table confidentially. 'How about you?'

'What about me, Tony?' she clarified. 'I have never been here before so I could not have...done anything in here.'

'Have you ever had sex in a restaurant?' he inquired, gazing at her so intently that she squirmed uncomfortably, wondering what he was imagining.

'No,' she replied flatly. 'I rarely went to restaurants in Israel,' she explained.

He considered this. 'Anywhere unusual, then,' he extended.

She studied his eyes, searching for any intent. 'Yes,' was the short answer.

'Where?' he asked eagerly.

She snorted. 'Many places. In Mossad, I did not often get the privilege of a bed.'

'Where was the most unusual place?' he persisted.

'I have already answered,' she protested. 'It's your turn.' She shifted in her seat, weighing up the many possibilities. 'Longest you've ever had sex?' He opened his mouth to answer. 'Continuously, no breaks allowed,' she added. He shut his mouth and frowned, his forehead furrowing in thought.

'Two hours,' he answered, wincing at the low number.

She chuckled. 'Really?' she asked dubiously, giggling into her water. 'Two hours, huh?'

'Now answer your question,' he demanded, his voice more petulant than defensive.

She chewed her lip thoughtfully. 'On top of a tank,' she decided. He raised his eyebrows sceptically. 'I was in the army and it was kind of a dull day,' she shrugged.

'Is that when you use your vibrator?' he asked without thinking before clamping a horrified hand over his runaway mouth. She didn't answer. 'Sorry,' he muttered. 'I didn't mean...'

'That's ok,' she interrupted his apologies. She took a deep breath and prepared an answer. After all, that was the reason that they were sitting opposite each other in this restaurant, surrounded by couples on dates.


	7. The Offer

She lifted her water to her mouth and stared at him over the rim of the glass, hiding from the inevitable conversation that they would have. She had agreed to clear the air, after all, so she was obliged to talk to him about her personal sex life. She giggled. She could never have imagined them having this conversation so seriously when they met all those years ago. Then, the flirting had been harmless and had not jeopardised their job. Now, their partnership had been tossed and flung around the turmoil of their lives that any innocent touch froze them both and caused them to avoid each other until the goose bumps had subsided.

Tony stared into her eyes, studying the wide, brown orbs for indications of her current mood. He hoped that she was going to be honest and sharing, instead of brushing him off. Perhaps he had already put his foot in it when he blurted out his question, and she had clammed up before he got a chance to gently probe. After years of experience, he knew how to prise her open and persuade her to confide in him. And, God, did he want her to share the details of her secret stash of sex toys with him. She was mysterious and he pounced on any opportunity to understand her better. If she opened up about masturbation, they would have reached the pinnacle of their trust and respect for one another.

'Are you ready to order?' the waitress asked, hovering by their table and interrupting the lustful gaze linking her two customers.

Ziva broke the stare first, turning to look at the waitress. 'Yes.' She chanced a furtive glance at Tony. 'I'll have the oysters,' she replied evenly.

Tony choked into his water and stared at her in disbelief. She was eying him amusedly. He hesitated before returning the grin.

'The same as her,' he requested. 'And we'll share an avocado salad.'

Ziva frowned, confused by the last order, but nodded and handed the waitress their menus.

'Avocado salad?' she queried.

'Yeah, it also increases libido,' he explained.

Ziva chuckled. 'Oh, is that why you thought I ordered oysters?' she inquired, her eyes dancing. 'No, Tony, I just _really _love oysters.'

Tony's smile did not falter. 'Right, Ziva. It had nothing to do with the sexual nature of its benefits,' he agreed sarcastically.

'Why do you automatically assume that I am screwing you, Tony?' Ziva asked innocently.

Tony grinned, rolling his eyes at her slight mistake. 'You are screwing _with _me, Ziva,' he corrected.

'I am not screwing with you either,' she defended.

'You ordered oysters,' he pointed out. 'Straight after we were discussing your unusual venues for sex.'

'And your pathetic track record of being able to stay stiff,' she countered cruelly.

'Hey,' Tony protested, hurt by her cutting jibe. 'Two hours is a perfectly respectable length of time. I like to please my lady, not injure her.'

'I would not be injured after two hours,' Ziva dismissed. 'It would take a lot longer than that for me to give up.' She cocked her head and smiled secretly. 'I wouldn't even need oysters.'

'That explains the masturbation,' Tony replied, his heart pounding as he waited for her reply.

'I guess it does,' she agreed smoothly. Tony waited for her continue, his mouth remaining firmly shut until she gave him something more. 'I do not use them all the time,' she relented.

'But often,' Tony clarified eagerly.

'It depends,' she shrugged, rolling her eyes at his childish excitement. 'Don't tell me that you don't do it, Tony,' she attacked. 'I would not believe you.'

Tony blushed and ducked his head, mumbling something incoherently. Ziva snorted, satisfied by the answer.

The waitress appeared again, bearing two plates of oysters and a salad. Ziva thanked her and she hurried away, her cheeks flushed scarlet.

'Bon appétit,' Ziva wished, licking her lips seductively.

'I will,' he answered, grinning at her across the table. He lowered his eyes when the gaze became too intense and began to eat his oysters. Ziva followed his example and tucked in, eating hers a little more daintily than he was managing. She sat back in her chair and eyed him as he struggled to finish his plate. Finally, he sat back to, licking his lips. 'Feeling horny yet?' he asked.

'Yes,' Ziva shot back. 'I shall have to excuse myself and slip off to touch myself in the ladies' room.' She smiled and, after a moment's hesitation, rose from her chair and strode towards the bathroom.

Tony stared after her incredulously. He didn't believe that she was really going to get off in a public restroom; she wasn't that shameless. Even as the thought was formed, he knew what he was going to have to do to satisfy his curiosity. He glanced around nervously and stood up, marching confidently towards the two bathroom doors. He did not pause before pushing open the women's bathroom door, trying not to draw attention to himself.

He blinked as he stepped into the white oasis, decorated with a shiny coat of brilliant white gloss paint and accessorised with pretty white seashells dotted about the counters. Three women were touching up their makeup in the mirror, and they all turned to glare at Tony.

'This is the women's bathroom,' one of them told Tony nastily. 'I think you've got yourself lost.'

'No,' he responded cheerfully. 'I have to talk to someone.' He moved towards the closed toilet door and leaned against it, grinning broadly at the stunned women. Muttering to each other, they abandoned their vanity and sidled out, shooting sneering glances at the male intruder. Tony shrugged and began to hum, tapping his fingers on the door.

Ziva gulped, she had heard Tony's voice, and his presence was making it very difficult to pee. She felt very self conscious and finally she gave up and unlocked the door.

'Come in, Tony,' she invited. He accepted the suggestion and squeezed in beside her.

'You can pee if you want to,' he offered.

She punched him lightly in the chest. 'What do you want?'

'Well, after your coy little remark back there, I just had to come and see for myself,' he told her.

'You want me to get off in front of you?' she laughed sceptically.

'If it isn't too much trouble,' he relented.

Ziva bit her lip and sat down on the toilet seat. His body was so close and the exotic aroma of his aftershave was gently tickling her nose. He looked so alluring standing confidently in front of her and she was struggling to control herself.

'The oysters have made me a little excited,' she conceded. 'Perhaps...'

'Perhaps?' Tony prompted expectantly.

'Perhaps I do need some relief,' she continued thoughtfully.

'Allow me,' Tony offered, taking her shoulders and standing her up. His strong arms circled her waist and he pulled her towards him, pressing her body against his. His hand cupped her chin and guided it towards his mouth. Slowly, the gap between their lips closed until they were kissing.


End file.
